Brew D'État Makes a Pumpkin Ale

Ever since I first laid lips upon Dogfish Head's Punkin Ale and Southern Tier's Pumpking, I had wanted to brew a pumpkin ale. Little did I know, Dylan's experience with these beers had awakened a similar yeuk. So, we decided that today, Saturday, September 4th, we would create a pumpkin ale the likes of which this great nation has never seen.

There was only one tiny problem with this ambitious plan: WE'RE IN THE MIDST OF A NATION-WIDE PUMPKIN SHORTAGE. This little snag presaged a host of difficulties that plagued us throughout the tedious brewing process, such as forgetting to purchase a thermometer and not cooling the wort quickly enough before pitching the yeast.

However, despite all odds, we managed to christen our first fermentation vessel filled with all the precursors to a pumpkin ale. We don't know if it'll be delicious or even potable, but we do know that it looks pretty. So, without further adieu, Dylan and Chip will show you how to brew a pumpkin ale:

Step 1: Get equipment, and

sterilize, sterilize, sterilize!

You boys doing a science experiment?

Cleanliness is key because bacteria is bad, as will be discussed later. Thus, we did a lot of sterilization. Dylan is already sterile, so we saved some time there.

Step 2: Gather supplies

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to make 48 bottles of ale.

Ugh. Damn this pumpkin shortage! Could it be a communist ruse to strike at the very heart of the nuclear American family by halting the production of grandmas' pumpkin pies? Or maybe it's just due to bad weather. Yeah, probably the latter.

Even online, pumpkin is mightily expensive. We were forced to improvise and purchased 60 oz of "pumpkin pie mix" instead. Will the extra sugar produce a bigger alcohol concentration or a cloying mess? Will the additional spices be complementary or disgustingly overpowering?

Who knows. However, this certainly isn't the craziest beer recipe out there. And, as if I didn't ask enough rhetorical questions already: Is Necessity not the mother of Invention? DNA test pending.

Step 3: Steep grain in water for 20 minutes at 155 degrees

I swear it's not my bag, baby.

Steeping (also called "mashing") allows you to harness DIASTATIC POWER, which is basically a fancy word for getting an enzyme to convert the grain's unpalatable starch into yeast-friendly sugar. In the case of barely, maltose is the end result. We only steep a little bit of grain to help provide flavor and proteins and some other good stuff that doesn't come with malt extract (see Step 4).

Step 3b (optional): Remove grain from water and munch away

Nom Nom Nom!

"Leaving No Trace" has never been so gross. It's like nasty, malt-flavored oatmeal. I'm pretty sure the taste is on par with gruel, so heaven knows why Oliver Twist would want some more. The above picture required 3 retakes, 34 mints, and a therapist.

Step 4: Add malt extract

Chocolate syrup's uglier, less friendly sister.

Wort (pronounced "wert") is a goopy, syrupy mixture containing mostly sugar and water along with assorted proteins, fats, fatty acids, and other fun molecules. It's what yeast loooove to nom and will eventually become your beer. We brewed with malt extract (many breweries do the same), which is essentially the same as wort.

Fancy-schmancy elitists who do all-grain brewing must get the wort strictly from the mash rather than a big jug of malt extract. In other words, by using extract, we bypassed the annoying (some say "rewarding") initial steps required to go from barley -> wort. An all-grain brewer would do a larger-scale version of step 3 (and a little bit of extra magic to filter out some junk). They then would follow the remaining steps exactly the way we did.

Safe to say, all-grain brewing and malt-extract brewing produce great beers. I liken it to the difference between 35mm and digital cameras, respectively: both require skill, artistry, and diligence to produce consistently good results, but the former demands a bit more attention and provides a few extra degrees of freedom.

Step 5: Bring wort to boil

I've seen this before...oh, I know, in a colostomy bag.

You boil the wort for a few reasons: to stop diastasis, to create what's called the "hot break" (a coagulation of proteins and other unwanted molecules that will eventually drop out of solution), and to sterilize your wort (reducing your yeast's competition), among others. It looks and smells pretty unappetizing, but it's necessary.

Step 6: Add bittering hops and a can of pumpkin

He's got the whole hops, in his hands.

Hops act as preservatives and make beer taste crisp, bitter, earthy, floral, and/or citrusy (depending on the varietal). They balance out beer's sweet side, affording it more palatal complexity.

The cone of the hop plant, Humulus lupulus (n.b.: not a character in Harry Potter), is where the hop's magical oils are derived from. Did I mention it's related to the marijuana plant? By "magical oils," I simply mean those chemical compounds which are useful in beer-making.

We used hop pellets, which look like rabbit feed in the picture above. Pellets and freeze-dried hops are common forms used in the brewing process. The hops added at the start of the boil will bestow most of their bitterness and almost no aroma (explained later). Our bittering hop de jour was Hallertauer, a so-called "Noble Hop," which is very pleasant and not very bitter. Thank goodness; who likes bitter pumpkins?

We also tossed in a can of pumpkin mix at the beginning of the boil in order to bring out a lot of classic pumpkin flavor.

Step 7: Boil for 60 minutes

It smells worse than it looks, if that's any consolation.

Not much left to say here. Stir constantly and watch for boil-overs. That's when you get a mass of gross foam that cascades onto your stovetop. Luckily, Dylan and I remained vigilant and avoided such calamities. Some people recommend that you place a few pennies at the bottom of the pot to stave off boil-overs, but being watchful can also do the trick.

Step 8: Add finishing hops and more pumpkin

Easy Libby, as we affectionately called her.

The longer you boil something in a liquid, the more of its taste will transfer into the liquid. However, volatile chemicals, like wonderful odor molecules, will escape and fly away. Aromatic hops ("finishing hops") and stimulating spices should be added at the end of the boil so that your beer will have a great nose.

Dylan and I threw in another can of pumpkin pie mix at t-5 minutes. Then, with two minutes left, we added some pumpkin spices and Cascade hops. Yummy!

Step 9: Cool the wort

Making chilly beer.

Because bacteria grows best around 90-140 degrees F while yeast enjoys a balmy 80 degrees F, you need to drop the temperature of the wort down to 80 degrees or below as quickly as possible. This step is critical: the longer it takes the wort to cool, the greater the likelihood is for your beer to harbor funky bacterial flavors.

You'll also want to cool the wort down as fast as possible because it's a huge open target for airborne contaminants that will later activate and mess up your recipe. You can't seal everything up and store it away until it reaches a temperature amenable to your finicky yeast, so immediately pitching your yeast and sealing your fermenter is out of the question.

Finally, you'll drop the temp because the wort can oxidize more easily at higher temperatures. Oxidation creates bad tastes.

You see, there are so many ways to mess up your beer at this stage! It is imperative that you work to cool the wort, as expeditiously as humanly possible, even if drastic measures are needed (see below). For the infelicitous duo, Chip and Dylan, Step 9 took freaking forever.

Step 9b: No, seriously, dude, cool the damn wort.

It needs to be at 80, and the thermometer still says 86.

It's like R2D2 at a day spa.

Our recalcitrant wort needed some intervention, so we transferred it from a once-icy-now-toasty bath in the sink to a real bath. Chip resorted to wrapping a wet towel around the top half of the bucket while splashing it with water (as if it were a beached Shamu), leveraging the power of convection currents and water's heat capacity to accelerate the cooling process.

Still, it took far too long, and this gave us much anxiety (cleverly masked in the picture above).

Step 10: Transfer to primary fermentation vessel, pitch yeast, and store away from light and heat

You've got an infestation of beer in your basement.

This could have been broken down into additional steps, necessitating extra pictures. I'm fed up with laying it all out for you visually, so I'll limn this last step:

Transfer | With beer, you can have multiple vessels for fermentation. Most of the yeast's business gets done in the primary fermenter, so you put the wort in there first, add additional water to bring it to the correct gravity (sugar concentration) for fermentation, and toss in (pitch) a bunch of yeast. Then seal it up and sit back while the magic happens. An airlock prevents nasties from getting into the container while allowing carbon dioxide (a byproduct of fermentation) to come out.

Currently, our nascent beer is in the primary fermenter. You'll notice that the wort was already in the primary fermentation vessel during the cooling phase (see Step 10), which is usually a no-no, but not a big deal. Anyway, we got antsy.

After a week or so, we will transfer the fermented wort to a secondary fermenter, leaving behind the "gunk" from the boil and primary fermentation (dead yeast, bits of hops, proteins from grains and pumpkin, etc.). This clears the beer up.

Finally, we'll bottle condition for two weeks, puting the beer in bottles with some extra sugar for the yeast to munch on. That way, they can kick out some carbon dioxide gas to make the beer fizzy and delicious.

Note that this whole process takes about a month. Good things come to those who (brew and) wait.

Pitch | Again, pitching yeast just means adding yeast to wort so that the yeast can start their work of converting that nasty-looking soup into Ninkasi's nectar. There are different regimens for pitching yeast depending on the beer's style and your OCD level. We just pitched the yeast all at once when the temperature got around 80 degrees. That usually works fine for ales.

Hide | You store beer away from light to keep sulfur from getting knocked off one molecule and binding to another. This sulfur shuffle yields a skunky taste (literally, the chemical formula of the funky scent is similar to that of a component of skunk spray...ewwww!).


Phew, that whole process was almost more than one man could handle. Or two. We learned a great deal about the brewing process: the dos, the don'ts, the forget-me-nots. Even without assurance that our ale will be fit for human consumption, the whole affair was very rewarding. We look forward to honing our craft and experimenting a little. I hope you enjoyed this post, and if you're interested in brewing your own beer, buy a book (I love this one), and give it a shot! It's easy as 1-2-3...11!

(Good) (Cheap) Local Beer!

I admit, Indianapolis is not exactly world-renowned for its breweries. Okay, Indianapolis is not known for a whole lot of anything (see how fast you can name ten things about Indianapolis - or even five - okay, go!)... But what Indy is certainly not known for is its beer. In fact, before 2009, the Indianapolis Brewing Company was the last active brewery in the city, and the IBC shut its doors shortly after WWII.

On July 1, 2009, at long last, Sun King Brewery tapped a locally brewed beer (available for commercial distribution) for the first time in over 60 years. The brewery has since been welcomed by the city like a girl at an all-boys camp. Everyone seems to be talking about it, and most are thrilled to have it around. The brewery has already been written up in the city paper on numerous occasions, and it's rare to find a restaurant in the area that doesn't carry at least one of the brewery's offerings (see their listing of draft locations: http://www.sunkingbrewing.com/locations).

Still in its infancy, Sun King made Indy proud by bringing home two awards at this year's World Beer Cup: a Silver for the Sunlight Cream Ale in the Blonde or Golden Ale category and a Bronze for the Dominator Doppelbock in the German-style Doppelbock or Eisbock category. Our parched community has finally begun to slake its decades-long thirst for local beer, and I decided to stop by the brewery today to pick up something for tailgating at the big Indiana rivalry football game tomorrow between Notre Dame and Purdue.

I had visited the brewery on a quiet Saturday several months ago, but on a Friday afternoon, the brewery was hopping (with pun very much intended). Don't know if it's part of a Friday special, but when I walked in, I was given 6 tickets to sample the beers. Free. Just for walking in. Gotta love that hometown hospitality. Obviously, I had to sample all six on tap, including their four year-round house beers and their two seasonals (Oktoberfest had just gone on tap yesterday and the other was a brown ale called Crabón Sustantivo Marron - or Crab Apple Brown). I also came armed with half-gallon and quarter-gallon growlers and, inevitably, agonized over which beers to get, and then which would be the half-gallon and which the quarter-gallon. Sometimes life is hard...

The photo above is me waiting in line to get them filled (not pictured: the tasting tables and the sweet brewing warehouse). If it's not obvious from the length of the line or the growlers on the tables, people were loving their growler fills - and what's not to love when Friday is $5 fills?? If I may quote my friend Luda - "Don't stop, get it get it."

Drink local beer! (Especially when it's good - and affordable!)

Barack's Big Beer Bets

Following the United States' loss to Canada in the 2010 Winter Olympics ice hockey finals, President Obama settled a friendly wager with the Canadian Prime Minister, sending him Molson with a little taste of America--a case of Yuengling--to go along with it. A few months later, he made a similar bet with British Prime Minister David Cameron over the World Cup game, but it ended in a draw. Sadly, both leaders stayed dry.

I can really appreciate a president who enjoys his brew. And a beer-loving Commander in Chief should come at no surprise given the fact that many of our Founding Fathers brewed beer. Some even developed their own original recipes. So next time you pledge allegiance, make sure you hold a cold one to your heart; beer is as tied up with our American heritage as the Star-Spangled Banner.

...

If you want my opinion, I think that a few cases of Arrogant Bastard would have sent a more powerful American message. Next time, mayhap.

Fried Beer!?

I was once at a party where a man was frying Snickers bars. This new innovation at once confused and delighted me, so I approached the man as he battered another bar with a thick, syrupy concoction. I pried with great interest:

"What other types of things can you fry?"

"Anything."

The man responded with terse confidence, a smug grin creeping across his face as he continued to busy himself with his craft. A mere moment later, empiricism got the best of me, and I returned to demand proof.

"What about Cotton Candy?"

Now the gauntlet was thrown down, and, predictably, he took up my wager with a cocky smirk.

I handed him a large ball of cotton candy I had procured on approach, anticipating his acquiescence to my friendly challenge. Despite my initial incredulity, I actually I did want to believe that, indeed, you can fry anything. It's the pipe dream of all Southern food-lovers. And his own confidence inspired hope in me.

However, within minutes, despite attempts at containment, the ball of cotton candy had mostly dissolved into his batter. The goopy mixture was subsequently transferred to the fryer, dripping with futility, reduced to almost nothing. The loose aggregate of brown and pink sunk into the burbling oil like a wet blanket, and the resulting victual resembled a piece of fried chicken skin flecked with pink sprinkles. It tasted like crispy sugar-butter, like batter, like shattered dreams. I considered the experiment a failure and went away somewhat disheartened at the revelation that there were indeed pragmatic limitations to what we can fry. Was this it? Had we fried all there was to fry? These questions burned with their pitiful finality, and the epistemic claustrophobia engendered thereby would haunt me to this today.

But, lo! What new culinary miracle hath science wrought? Well, friends, we've put a man on the moon, conquered disease, connected the globe, de-crusted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and finally, we've fried beer.



That's right. Fried beer. It's injected into a pocket of pretzel-like dough, deep fried, and served up for your (adult) enjoyment. I'm confident that we've hit the ceiling in terms of ground-breaking discoveries. Science, you can retire.

The Quest for Sour Ales (and others)

Last year's Great Taste of the Midwest for me could easily be summed up with one word: hops. It was all about finding the hoppiest IPA out there, and it certainly took a heavy toll on my palate.

This year, however, was all about finding the ultimate sour beer. My affinity for tart ales takes me back slightly more than a year ago to Buffalo, NY, at the Brewing News headquarters. In the middle of one of our usual "beer and cheese" breaks, my boss pulled out a bottle of New Glarus Berliner Weiss, part of their 'Unplugged' series. I tilted my glass back and drank...it was highly carbonated and very, very tart. Honestly, I had never had anything quite like it. From that moment on, I was hooked. This newfound love was only exacerbated when, a few weeks later, I had Ommegang's phenomenal Flemish red ale, Rouge.

Anyways, that's the background as to why I was really shooting for the mouth-puckering brews at this year's fest. I walked through the entrance around 10:30 and picked up my media pass--I was helping cover the event for the Great Lakes Brewing News, one of our seven regional papers. I spent the first half hour walking around, scoping out the brews and finally made a choice...Tyranena's Double Down and Dirty Stout. Thick, rich and full of chocolate, it was the best stout I had all day (yes, even better than Dark Lord and the E.T.'s Reese's Pieces). Oh, and the best part? It was only available to those who got in before 1pm (aka media, volunteers, etc.).

Oh wait, I'm supposed to be talking about sour ales, aren't I? Kudos to Lakefront Brewery for tolerating my persistent returns to their booth--the beer I was in search of was Rosie, which they were having trouble getting tapped due to a severe lack of ice (a number of breweries were having this issue). Once they got it working, I was in heaven. Highly carbonated with wonderful cherry notes, this beer has been a standout since I visited their booth at Quivey's Grove last October. After having my Rosie fix, I sauntered over to Bell's tent, where I had another superb sour--Wild One. I find the combination of tartness and cherries to be completely complimentary, and this was no exception. The beer was excellent and I had to get a refill once I was done with the first glass.

I made my way over to Jolly Pumpkin, a Michigan Brewery known for their exceptional Belgian Ales, and particularly the sour ones. I had never had their Kriek before, so naturally, it was the first one I tried. Yet another sour brown combined with...cherries, it was incredible. It was the third brewery I visited, and sour ales had yet to fail me. At 1pm, Tyranena released 'Deb and Glenn's Kinda Lambic', aged in bourbon barrels. A brown ale fermented with [at least] three different kinds of fruit, it was awesome, and I let their owner Rob Larson know the following night when I was fortunate enough to join him (and my boss) for dinner. Sidenote: My boss, William Randolph Thirst (also known as "Bill Metzger") accomplished the rather incredible feat of securing a keg of Bitter Woman IPA for my aunt's upcoming wedding. Well done, seriously.

Finally, I made my way over to the Real Ale tent, which I was sure would have a number of sour, mouth-puckering brews. My first choice was Jolly Pumpkin's Oak-aged Calabaza Blanca with Hibiscus. It was absolutely phenomenal and extremely refreshing. The Hibiscus apparently adds additional aging to the beer, helping with the tartness. My second beer was Kuhnhenn's two-year aged Geuze. And, without a doubt, this was my "Beer of the Fest." They combined the two-year aged beer with fresh sour ale, and the result was absolutely astonishing. I kept count on how many times I had my glass refilled with the geuze, and the number was a mildly-insane...7. The keg was eventually completely empty around four o'clock, and I was more than happy to contribute!

This year's Great Taste of the Midwest was absolutely wonderful. I had many, many beers in all kinds of styles, but for me, this year's was all about the sours...and they did not disappoint. In fact, sour ales may have taken over the infamous IPA as my #1 beer style, although I suppose only time will tell. Next up on the calendar is Quivey's Grove, which takes place the first weekend in October. Will I have a new style and beer quest? Stay tuned to find out!

The Great Taste of the Midwest

Aside from her natural beauty and that je ne sais qoi charm, Madison plays host to the second largest beer festival in the U.S.: The Great Taste of the Midwest. This year, five gigantic tents and a few satellite cabanas housed over 120 breweries serving some 500 beers from 11 Midwest states.

The party began at 1:00 p.m. on Saturday in Olin Park, about a mile from the Capitol building. The din of 3000 bon-imbibants melded with the music from the folk and bluegrass bands scattered among the tents, providing a carefree, jovial soundtrack for the full five hours of drinking. Even the sun decided to make an appearance late in the day after severe negotiations with heavy, gray clouds. Not even Helios himself would miss the Great Taste.

Ales were so in this year. Belgian Ales and IPAs seemed to predominate, though emissaries from every style were poured with wild abandon. A "Real Ales" tent was devoted specifically to cask-conditioned, unfiltered ales served at cellar temperature. Instead of being pumped from a conventional beer engine, they went ultra-old-school and used gravity for pour power. To expedite the serving process, each cask was marked with a number. You'd hand over your glass, bark out a number, and a server would quickly disappear to fetch your beer from the racks like a crazed librarian on a search for the public library's last copy of Twilight at the behest of a bawling tween needing her fix. I'm sorry; I lost control of that metaphor, and I apologize for anyone hurt in the process.

The "Real Ales" tent was real tasty all right, but the real action was at the Brewers' tents, where current inventory, special releases, SWAG, and merch were all up for grabs. The festival's program featured a map and key for navigation purposes, allowing us to easily locate our old standbys and promising candidates. Strategy is key. Here's your chance to talk to the brewers a bit, make some banter in line, and get a feel for what a brewery is all about. You can't waffle and dither and temporize with your crippling indecision. This isn't for petal pickers and nail biters. Choosing a brewery and specific beer after an arduous deliberation process can lose you valuable time, and you'll leave with a head full of regrets and a bloodstream full of sobriety. Thus, taking time to review the program before a festival will help maximize your experience. Fortunately, I just consulted with Dylan, who, possessing a media pass, was able to initiate the drinking process 2 hours before everyone else. His advise enabled me to hit the all-stars immediately before they became too popular (and before the alcohol/hops tempered my tastebuds). So, like many successful men before me, I simply had to stand on the shoulders of Jews. I mean giants.

Still, you don't need to be Eddie Carmel with a Magellan GPS to find your way around a beer festival. Most breweries had some great offerings. The crowd favorites--Bell's, Founders, Goose Island, Three Floyd's--took to the field with their predictably impressive selections on tap. I had a quasi-"Saint Theresa" moment during the 2:30 p.m. release of Three Floyd's 2008 Dark Lord. It can best be described in one word. However, I generally tried to avoid the usual suspects, given my familiarity with them. I was in the business for something new and possibly a little crazy. Thankfully, a few new faces were able to knock me out with their consummate stylistic renditions and, in some cases, heretically unorthodox recipes.

A beer festival's quality indicator is incontrovertibly a long line, and one particular brewery had a disproportionately huge brew queue. As many as 30 people waited patiently behind this brewery's table while other brewers' taps sat forlorn and idle nearby. Obviously, there had to be a reason for this gravitation, so I, too, waited in line with baited breath just to see what this hubbub was all about. When lips finally touched liquid, I knew that this was the festival's MVP. So, ladies and gentlemen, I now present to you, the blue ribbon winner at The Great Taste of the Midwest, Kunhenn Brewing Co LLC.

Kunhenn's, a microbrewery from Michigan, is owned and operated by the Kunhenn brothers (families really know how to brew; just ask Three Floyds). They bill their brews as "Out of This World," adopting a little green alien as their mascot. Their approach to beer can be best described as weird, wet, wild, and fun...with a dash of sophistication.

Kunhenn's distribute locally in Michigan out of a brewpub which carries their wine, mead, and an outstanding array of craft beers. They offer classes for brewing a batch beer or making wine on premise, enjoining their customers to not only get a fish, but learn to catch one as well. Their ascendancy in the Michigan Craft Beer scene owes to unbridled inventiveness and a fantastic assortment of great-tasting beers that draw loyal followings. Speaking of beers, here's where we start the crazy talk.

ET's Reese's Pieces Stout. Inky black with a dark, sand-dune head, this strange brew's peanut-buttery-chocolate nose perfectly replicated the scent of my roommate's Reese's Puffs cereal I had eaten that very morning. The taste was akin to Hershey's chocolate syrup with suggestions of coffee, leaving the peanut butter component to your olfactory glands only. It was heavy, and delicious, and weird. Love at first sip. Oh, I almost forgot: to top off the whole experience, they dropped dry ice pellets onto beer's head, releasing an eerie white mist. Drinkers emerged from the tent with what seemed like the extraterrestrial nostrum from a Star Wars apothecary.

Alien Ale. A pepper beer infused with three different kinds of pepper. While not as gentle as The Grumpy Troll's Slow Eddy or as aggressive as Great Dane's Tripepper Pilsner, it's a fresh mouthful of jalapeño that answers the question: ¿Que?

Creme Brulee Java Stout. Can life get any better? 4 out of 5 optimists say "No." I did not try this beverage, as the keg was kicked half-way through the festival, so I have no authoritative comment. But, c'mon. Beer + Creme Brulee + Java = ridic. The fact that it ran out so quickly is sufficient testimony to its awesomeness.

In short, Kunhenn's is breaking the rules in all the right ways. More beer reviews may be forthcoming, potentially in a podcast. I just had to comment on the highlights of the day. Next year, I urge you to drive, fly, or flubber out to Madison for the 2011 Great Taste of the Midwest. With so many beers and beer lovers in one place, you're bound to find your Happy Place. Peace ya'll.

Get Your Knowledge On

Perfect for the casual quaffer, the burgeoning beerthusiast, and the elite epicurean alike: click here to learn all about beer!

Thanks for the blog fodder, Kara!

Lager v. Ale

Ah, the age-old debate between beer types. A rivalry drenched in blood and steeped intrigue. Well, ok, so the differences between them probably never manifested in some sanguinary battle or even bad blood, but Lagers and Ales are two very different animals and offer very different gustatory experiences.

Before we delve into beer arcana and probe the limitless depths of the LvA debate, let's wax historically.

The world's greatest minds generally agree that beer arrived fashionably late in human evolution somewhere around 9000 B.C. (based on context clues) or 3500 B.C. (based on chemical evidence). Whatever; it's old.

To be sure, the Babylonians definitely got crunk. Beer gets a shout-out in the Code of Hammurabi (c. 1750 B.C.), which prescribed a hearty ration of beer to the good drinker and a particularly ironic drowning regimen to the bad brewer:

108. If a tavern-keeper (feminine) does not accept corn according to gross weight in payment of drink, but takes money, and the price of the drink is less than that of the corn, she shall be convicted and thrown into the water.

The contemporary conception of beer--a blessed, boozy trinity of hops, barley, and water--did not strike the ancients as particularly intuitive. Brewers throughout history have used various recipes incorporating fruits, herbs, honey, and various adjuncts in order to produce a panoply of quaffable products. Grapes, honey, and saffron can be found in Dogfishhead's Midas Touch, which is a throwback to 2700 BC--it's brewed from a recipe found in King Midas' tomb.

While yielding a viable product with plenty of nutrients, taste, and inhibition-lowering potential, these ancient recipes lacked a key ingredient. I saw on a History Channel special that shelf-life was generally about a week or so. This wouldn't do. As the perfect alternative to fetid, contaminated well water, beer needed something to keep it from expiring so quickly. In the 1500s, hops become a potent preservative, thanks to innovative German monks and their dedication to beer. While on Lenten fasts, monks fortified their diets with hearty helpings of duds, establishing them as some of the most experienced craftsman in the art of brewing. Indeed, to this day, seven monasteries produce the world's only true Trappist style ales.

Sometime during the Middle Ages, a schism in the beer kingdom began to avail itself. Two beer types diverged and proliferated and went on to garner distinct and very unique identities. The rift wasn't a matter of graven images or contract theory or a bunch of theses nailed to church doors, just a tiny little microorganism called yeast.

Ales

The word Ale might instantly summon images and memories of India pale ale (IPA), the hoppy, bitter, and more alcoholic beer that you either love or hate. However, Ale's phylogenetic tree is vast and diverse, encompassing a gallimaufry of styles like:

Altbier- a German beer with medium to high bitterness without too much else to write home about.
Brown Ale- a British beer with hardly any bitterness, a generous amount of sweet maltiness
Lambic- a Belgian sour beer made from large amounts of unmalted wheat with a complex fruity palate
Stout- an Irish version of Britain's Porter style (also an ale) made from roasted malt, typically associated with heft, coffee, chocolate, and men.
Wheat Beer- German beers made with lots of wheat malt that go down great; best served in a boot.

Ales are top-fermented, meaning that the yeast sits at the top of the fermentation vessel and most of the fermentation happens here. They're typically fermented at warm temperatures (59-75 degrees F) anywhere from 3 weeks to several months. Due to the warmth of the brewing environs, ale yeasts kick out a lot esters, which are compounds typically associated with flowery and fruity tastes. Esters are super complex, which helps explain why ales are so varied and discernibly different in taste, smell, and mouthfeel.

Notable yeast strains used in ale brewing include Saccharomyces cervisiae and, to a much lesser extent, Brettanomyces. Brettanomyces is used in only a few styles, such as Lambics, because it's actually a contaminant, a wild yeast strain that can lend a band-aid or barnyard-like taste to the beer. However, it also has some counterbalancing virtues, like infusing the beer with hints of bacon, spice, and clove that make Lambics so unique. Want to rate your favorite strain of Brettanomyces? Go here, ya geek!

Lagers

A Lager can be defined as a beer brewed at cooler temperatures with yeast at the bottom. "Lagering" might not be prevalent in your everyday vernacular, but it refers to the cold storage of beer (Lager is German "to store"). Lagers emerged late on the scene in history. The invention of refrigeration enabled brewers to capitalize on a finicky, genetically mutated Saccharomyces species that worked well in low, stable temperatures. While Lager yeast requires more attention (even a 1 degree change in temperature during fermentation can drastically alter taste and alcohol content), it opens up a portal to an entirely new realm of beer drinking.

Lower-temperature fermentation yields less esters and phenols, leading to a reduction in fruity notes and medicinal tastes. Drinkability is not only the slogan of a popular pale lager (cough, Bud Light, cough), it's the reason why so much lager is consumed at Oktoberfest and Nascar. Lagers can be drunk by the gallon, whereas the palatial complexity of ales make them great companions to the steady, appreciative drinker.

A colder beer also means more dextrins. These are the unfermentable components of the malt that imbue the beer with added mouthfeel and taste. If you're like 90% of America that drinks lager beers, you're probably not used to these characteristics, having grown up with Natty Light and Bud Light. But one swig of a big-bodied, cloying Doppelbock will have you quickly doubting its relation to Miller, Budweiser, and Coors products.

While we're on the subject, let me call out some of the great Lager styles

Bock- a strong, russet-colored, German beer with toasty notes and plenty of heft (about as close to liquid bread as lagers come).
Eisbock- a subgenre of Bock, the Eisbock is created when a bock is cooled down so that ice crystals begin to form (freeze distillation). These are then scooped out, yielding a more concentrated beer (in taste and alcohol). Ever heard of Natty Ice? It's an Eisbock. Don't start to cast aspersions on a very regal beer style...we'll call Natty Ice "The prodigal son who'll never return."
Malt Liquor- Surprised? Due to some technical definitions, any lager with more than 5% alcohol should be called Malt Liquor.
Pilsner- a Czech beer with medium bitterness, medium body, and full flavor

So that's the beer world according to a Manichaean. Lagers and Ales. But the fun doesn't stop here. As I indicated, the styles of lagers and ale are virtually limitless, and the diversity of tastes within these genres is readily discernible. Scientists have isolated over 1000 distinct flavors in beer, which is way more then wine. And the tastes will continue to diversify, with brewers like Dogfishhead adding essences, extracts, and whole foods into their brew kettles; scientists cross-pollinating different species of hops to unleash new strains into the market; and breweries continually tweaking and revamping the brewing process. This is a good era in which to live.

The vibrancy and innovation of the beer industry has engendered an affordable and versatile product befitting of every taste under the sun. Maybe that's why, every year, the world drinks enough beer to fill 60,000 Olympic-sized swimming pools. I've written this article by looking at beer from 36,000 feet--breaking it down into simply Lagers vs. Ales--so that you can hopefully make the first step towards finding your preference. Get adventurous. Beer is unique, beer is vital, and beer is good.

Rants and Raves, Vol. 1

Instead of talking about news in the brewing industry every week, I thought it would be a bit more entertaining to do a weekly post where I talk about what I've got a problem with in the brewing industry, and follow it up with something more positive. Anyways, time to start it off:

Rant: Miller Lite and their ever-evolving ways of tricking the average consumer into purchasing their shitty beer. First, they came up with the fraudulent "triple-hopped" logo, failing to mention that all beers are essentially hopped at least three times throughout the brewing process. Unfortunately, the corn and rice they add as filler into their beer doesn't help the taste. Now, they've come out with their new "vortex" bottle, which is simply a bottle that twirls the beer as it pours out. Does it add anything to the taste? No. Does it release more aroma? No. So, what exactly does it do? Well, it gives the bottle a new design, which I suppose looks sort of cool, if you're into that sort of thing. The only way I want my Miller Lite is ice cold, so I don't have to endure its urine-like flavor.

Rave: Now, switching over to something more positive--Belgian IPAs. Stone and Victory started this trend about a year (maybe a bit more) ago with their Belgique IPA and Wild Devil, respectively...it's essentially an IPA with added Belgian yeast. Hooray, experimentation! The style has truly taken off, and for those of us who are true hopheads, it's a welcome-addition to the IPA family. Wild Devil is one of my favorites, but Ale Asylum's Bedlam has skyrocketed to the top of my list as well. The beer has a really nice, fresh hoppy flavor to it, along with a backbone of yeasty-goodness. Here are five Belgian IPAs I consider must-haves:

1. Stone Cali-Belgique
2. Victory Hop Devil
3. Ale Asylum Bedlam
4. Green Flash Le Freak
5. Flying Dog Raging Bitch (hey, I didn't come up with the name)

That's it for this week's Rants and Raves--join us next time, when I find something new to complain (and praise) about!

Brews of Summer

As we officially prepare to enter the summer season, it's always nice to remind people that there are, in fact, a bunch of beers that tend to accompany the warm weather and sunny days. As I'm sure you're all well-aware, I love my summers to be full of hops! Well, refreshing hops, at least. Anyways, without further adieu, I present the Dylan Katz "Best Beers of Summer" list (complete with BeerAdvocate profiles!):

1) Long Trail Belgian White: This is always going to be one of my favorite summer sippers. Strong, citrusy lemon flavors and a decent degree of sweetness make this an incredibly refreshing witbier, perfect for those days where you need something to help stave off the scorching heat. Unfortunately, we can't get it out here in Wisconsin, but for those on the East Coast--this beer is a must have. Check out the reviews here.

2) Southern Tier Hopsun: By far and away, my absolute #1 summer seasonal. If you've had Three Floyds Gumballhead, you'll be sure to love this hoppy wheat beer. Sweet, citrus notes do a great job of accompanying a heavy hops background. I always pick up a case of this whenever it comes out, and was thrilled to find this beer in Madison! With my six-pack of Southern Tier in hand, I'm all set for a day of R&R. Check it out!

3) Ithaca Brewing Co.'s Flower Power: Ah, yes, one of IBC's finest brews. The first time I had this, I was blown away--a very heavy, grapefruit flavor combined with a perfect balance of hops and malt. Absolutely phenomenal, and right at the top of my list of best IPAs in the US. Unfortunately, it's not available in Madison (they don't extend out past Ohio), but if you can get...you simply cannot go wrong. BA has the scoop on this one!

4) Brute, from IBC: By now, if you haven't figured out my love affair with Ithaca Brewing Co., now's as good a time as ever to take a hint--Brute is an "American Wild Ale" that is definitely not for the feint of heart. Lovers of Flemish Sour Ales and Lambics will have no problem downing this one, which is sour, highly carbonated, and has a wonderful fruitiness to it...a combination of apples, lemon and maybe even pear. If you can find this rare, 22oz monster--PICK IT UP! It's wonderful.

5) Unibroue Éphémère: Ah, the last of the best--another fantastically refreshing beer. Brewed with apples, this moderately carbonated beer is the ideal accompaniment to a meal of burgers and brats on a hot, sunny day. Oh, and the best part? You can get it pretty much anywhere in the US! More info...here!

Dark Lord Day Thoughts, Round 2

While my perspective won't be quite as verbose as Chip's, I'm definitely going to rehash a few of the notable highlights. We arrived around 8am, maybe slightly before. Lots and lots of people--rough estimates put the attendance at well over 10,000 beer fanatics. Walking down the line of people waiting was really quite a treat...many attendees sat in their lawn chairs, drinking terrific beers out of tasting glasses. And now, the wonderful series of happenings that led up to the big moment:
1) Guy in line once we arrived: "Why is your glass empty? We need to fix that!"
- Into my glass pours a Boulevard Imperial Stout, from Kansas City. Thick, heavy, delicious.
- This guy was great--we gave him a few New Glarus beers to try, and the verdict seemed fairly positive. Sweet.
2) Man riding on motorized scooter--he was drunk, he was bizarre, he was awesome.
3) Guys from the southern portion of the US--who knew I'd be able to drink Foothills beer while
on line for Dark Lord?! Here is the following conversation that took place to lead up to this moment:
Me: "So, where are you guys from?"
Them: "Winston-Salem, NC"
Me: "Oh, sweet! Have you ever had Foothills' beer?"
Them: "Had it?! Hell, we've got a couple of growlers right here in this cooler!"

I then proceeded to have some Hoppyum from Foothills. It was absolutely wonderful and
hoppy (who could've guessed?).

4) After buying the Dark Lord, I was approached by a guy from Three Floyds: "Hey, did you get a chance to try the oak-aged DL yet?" I had not. He let me try some. Yes, it was delicious.
5) Finally, the Guest Beer tent. Highlights:
- Kentucky Breakfast Stout, from Founders--I've said it once, I'll say it a million times: It's a great beer, but I prefer their normal Breakfast Stout...it's just not as heavy.
- Union Jack IPA, from Firestone Walker: It lost in the finals of the National IPA Championship, and I had been dying to taste it. Verdict: Excellent, excellent beer. It lacked some balance on the malt side, but the hoppy taste was fresh, bitter and wonderful.
- Dark Horse Double-Crooked Tree: JT got it, I tried it, and it didn't disappoint. A nice, copper-colored haze with a terrific balance of hop and malt character. An A+ beer.

Well, that's it for now...maybe I'll update this a bit later. Sunday, I have the privilege of waiting on line for 6 hours to get tickets for Great Taste of the Midwest. I'm really going to be pining for a media pass, but this will be a good backup plan. Good day, readers, good day!

The Stout that Launched a Thousand Chips

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Sin City Brewery's Classic Irish Dry Stout

On March 22nd at 12:53 P.M., I was walking back from the Planet Hollywood casino through the Miracle Mile when I chanced upon a tiny little bar. Though overflowing with gaudy paraphernalia and shameless in its touristy sheen, the miniscule niche (barely larger than a New York hotdog stand) was a palatial oasis in a sea of Coors and Bud Lights. Craft beer! A beacon of hope to the discerning drinker. Beerus Ex Machina.

Ah, indeed it was fortuitous that I espied the diminutive watering hole at that very moment. I had wanted to forget the money I had ungraciously donated to countless pit bosses. I had wanted something to purge from my mouth the lingering vestiges of American macros that I had theretofore been imbibing. I had wanted something with taste, gravity, and spunk.

I promptly bee-lined for my new haven, pulled up a chair, and requested the thickest, blackest draft they had. Sin City Brewery was ready to oblige.

The bartender soon presented me with a pitch-black libation: their Classic Irish Dry Stout. As the name suggests, it's an Irish Dry Stout modeled after the iconic Guinness. I peered down into the cup, angling my nose to whiff any aromatics emerging from the muddy depths. Not much bouquet came through, though the smell could have been masked by the sterile plastic cup in which it was served. "Drat! It could taste like anything!" I thought, looking askance at the inert inky liquid. A few bubbles rose lazily to the surface. "I'm not going to drink myself," the beer seemed to say without any particular sense of urgency.

0 hour. Judgement Sip. Without the osmic reconnaissance to prepare my palate, I took an apprehensive swig.

The stout unsurprisingly delivered a simple, powerful melody of coffee and chocolate notes. I found it to be a little earthier than Guiness with a bolder coffee taste. Also hitting me with its modest maltiness, the taste transitioned gradually from sweet caramel to a dull bitterness. Hoppiness was rather low, though we all know that hops is not a desideratum of mine.

I liked the soft roasted characters as well, which weren't at all reminiscent of charcoal (thank heavens). It had a buttery mouthfeel with a slight prickliness thereafter, ending in a mildly acerbic aftertaste. With some hearty swills, I soon finished the satisfying brew and kicked back for a nap.

I give it a solid B.

BREW D'ETAT

Coming soon to a blog formerly named "Beer: An Odyssey" and "Beeriodical" near you...it's Brew D'Etat! And it's awesome.

Brews in the News

Well, looks like it's time for another weekly update from the world of brewing:

Preparations are underway in Chicago for the Brewers Association's Annual Craft Beer Conference. This year, it will take place from April 7-10 and will feature some terrific workshops, keynote speakers and of course...plenty of beer. Unfortunately, due to work, I will be unable to attend this year's conference, but if you can afford it...GO! More information available here.

The Indiana House of Representatives has passed a bill that will allow--wait for it--for the sale of carryout beer from Indiana's microbreweries on Sundays! A huge victory for our friends at Three Floyds, Upland Brewing, and all the other great breweries in Indiana. Check it out!

Oskar Blues Brewery, one of the pioneers of selling awesome canned craft beers, has announced its newest seasonal brew (and one we'll hopefully get to taste at the Hops and Props festival Saturday)--GUBNA, a double-IPA tipping the scales at nearly 10% ABV. BeerAdvocate has the story.

That's it for this week's 'Brews in the News.' Be sure to visit on Sunday, when we upload our latest podcast, recapping the Hops and Props beer festival from Oshkosh, WI. Here's the official website for the festival, if you'd like more info.

Our First Podcasts!

Check out our first two podcasts from Madison, Wisconsin! Dylan (and much less so, Chip) lead you through seven different suds: some good, some bad, and some ugly. So sit back, crack a cold one, and listen up! You can get all of our podcasts on Archive.org, by clicking the link on the right-hand side of the page.

Chip's Apt

Beers:
1. Kennebunkport IPA (Portland, Maine)
2. Founders Harvest Ale (Grand Rapids, Michigan)
3. Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale (Chico, California)
4. Lakefront Holiday Spice Lager (Milwaukee, Wisconsin)




Live from The Haze

Beers:
1. Dogfish Head Fort (Milton, Delaware)
2. Stone Smoked Porter (Escondido, CA)
3. Three Floyds Gumballhead (Munster, IN)

A Cry for Help!

While I don't doubt that hundreds of you are having an absolute blast reading our wonderful, wonderful blog, we've recently come to a bit of a conflict concerning the name--Beer: An Odyssey is too close to Beer Odyssey (a similarly named, but unrelated, blog).

So, help us out! We're looking for some suggestions for new names--something unique, catchy, and easy to say. I just updated our page to the new URL, but now we're looking for an awesome, new name. The offer below still stands!

Bonus: If you live in Madison, I'll buy you a pint of something really good (my choice, ha!) provided you come up with an awesome name.

All Hail the Dark Lord

Dark Lord Day is next month and still no word on golden ticket sales. Any idea what day in March tickets have gone on sale in the past?

Background for our loyal band of followers:

http://www.darklordday.com/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_Floyds_Brewing

Cuckoo for Craft

For every action, Newton noted, there's an equal and opposite reaction. So, with the rise of consumer hegemony brought on by globalization and the ascendancy of multinational corporations, there has been a corresponding diminution in local identity. Synergy replaces personality. Price trumps reputation.

But the human spirit isn't so easily tamed. An emphasis on corporate accountability, environmental responsibility, and vital local economy has come to define the present zeitgeist, a sort of neo-hippy movement made mainstream. Leery of the immense power of Big Business, consumers are choosing partners, rather than merely producers, in the marketplace.

With their preferences, consumers even the playing field in favor of small businesses, helping to foster fresh, novel ideas and products. As competition increases, so does the importance of the individual. Companies must once again learn the art of The Woo. Advertising isn't enough; companies must engage in consumer courtship. The primacy of identity is reinstated.

This view may be a bit Panglossian. Still, it is no wonder that craft beers, with their unique flavors, strong personality, and regional appeal, have become extremely popular. Early last year, craft beers saw intense market gains, growing by a whopping 9% in sales and 5% in volume in the first half of last year. In comparison, overall US and import sales declined by 1.3% and 9%, respectively (http://www.brewersassociation.org).

Craft brewers think of themselves as exploring all dimensions of Beerclidian space, infusing their duds with exotic essences like chocolate, fruits, jalapenos, and pecans. Attention to detail is paramount. Each beer is a coup de maitre, the culmination of imagination, experimentation, and just a tinge of mad scientist-like insanity. Craft brewers aren't thinking of mass-production, developing bland recipes that have the widest appeals. Instead, they want something revolutionary, something with presence, something people can either love or hate, but not dither somewhere in the inoffensive inane. The beers that emerge from craft breweries are distinctive, memorable, and, well, wild.

I think Rateabeer.com has an apt description of craft beers from the brewer's perspective:

Craft beer is primarily characterized by a brewer’s attention to recipes and ingredients that maximize the flavor, appearance and aroma of your beer. The craft brewer almost always personally oversees the selection of ingredients and the entire brewing process and constantly monitors flavor and quality. And unlike mass market beers, craft beer isn’t “contract brewed” in multiple facilities. The brewer is the one who both writes and follows the recipe. This isn’t just a quality measure -- it also ensures that you, the consumer, end up with a beer that’s more like a signed print in the art world and not just a poster.

Notice, too, that by brewing in their own facilities rather than outsourcing around the country, craft brewers maintain a geographic identity, often utilizing fresh, local ingredients. 21st Amendment Brewery in San Fransisco, for example, boasts recipes containing local watermelon, not processed syrups, in its Hell Or High Watermelon wheat beer.

With strong personalities, many craft beers and breweries have amassed a cult-like following. Take Three Floyd's Brewery, for example. Each year, this quirky craft brewery from Munster, Indiana hosts Dark Lords Day, a mecca for stout-thusiasts. For one day only, thousands of people flock to tiny Munster to purchase Dark Lord, a highly-acclaimed Russian Imperial Stout.

American craft beers aren't just interesting concotions; they're real winners. Many have taken gold in the World Beer Championships, which, though hosted in the US, extends its invitations to any brewery, anywhere, and uses blind taste testing to ensure fairness. Craft breweries consistently prove their worth, year after year in this competition. Rogue Ales, a brewery from Newport, Oregon, is a perfect case study: it has taken gold in sundry style categories, from amber ales (American Amber Ale) to hefeweizen (Half-E-Weizen), often for 3,4, or 5 consecutive years. Rogue's Old Crustacean Barelywine has won gold 7 times in its respective category.

And this is just one brewery, one competition. At beer competitions around the world, craft breweries are employing syncretic and highly experimental methods to challenge the longstanding reign of Old World institutions. And each American brew d'etat wins national and global recognition for heretofore unknown locales, like Munster, Indiana.

Identity, an American identity, local American identities, are being reasserted year after year, beer after beer.


If you're interested in idiosyncratic and iconoclastic tastes offered by craft beers, have ye a listen to Craft Beer Radio to help guide you through the savage terra incognita of craft beers. You'll discover that these beers have some serious soul.

Let me close with a gushing ode to the Craft:
Craft Brewing is an art, a skill, a philosophy. It's as beautiful and elegant as an idea, yet its fruits are tangible, tastable, delectable. And, like all good art, whether you praise it or detest it, you can appreciate any craft beer for what it is: a modern marvel of human creativity and the product of a careful, arduous process.

Two Polls

1. What are the best bargains out there for good beer?

2. What is your favorite "session" beer (let's say less than 5% abv)?

In terms of good beer buys, I think Sierra Nevada is pretty reasonable across its whole line, and the Pale Ale is available virtually everywhere. The Celebration Ale is amazing in the winter, and even the Bigfoot is pretty reasonable for the style at $11-12 for a sixer. I've also seen Two Hearted and Rogue's Mocha Porter, along with the year-round 3Floyds lines, at the grocery store for $8.99, and I feel like Kroger might be losing money on those sales. What other names should a budget-conscious beer lover be looking out for?

I'd also like to enjoy something tasty without stumbling off my barstool when I'm ready to leave. I've found Stone's Levitation (4.4%) and 3Floyds Gumballhead (4.8%) are both pretty solid non-"big" beers. Any other suggestions?

Live, from Madison, it's Friday Night!

Tonight, we embark on the first of our [temporarily named] "Beer Roundtable" series. Every week, we'll check out one of Madison's many outstanding bars, order a few brews, and have a discussion about each beer. We'll have guest reviewers and will be talking about the beer, the brewery, and our overall impressions of each one. Who knows, maybe people will learn something new! This week's venue? The Haze!

Title Says It All: "A Delicious Free-for-All"

How can I get an assignment like this for the New York Times?



http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/24/dining/reviews/24wine.html?pagewanted=1&em

Post if you've tried any of these dandies. I'm in love with Maudite (Chip, the one I had from the famous "unibrow," err.... I mean Unibroue brewery in Quebec). The only other one I've tried is Duvel, but not since I started getting into craft beer. I think I probably left one of these half-finished at Pub Night, or even (cringe) played a game of beer pong or two with it.... shame.

I am giddy that this is currently the #2 most emailed article on the Times website. More interest in beer => more demand for good brews => more great craft brewers in the market => so many more good options to sample. Win.

What's Brewing in the World of Beer?

Despite what the groundhog may have predicted a few weeks ago, spring is coming up quite quickly. And with it, of course, is a bevy of notable news--

Tomorrow, tickets for the third annual Savor beer festival in Washington, DC go on sale. The event attempts to separate itself from other festivals in that each brewery's beer is paired with various gourmet food selections. As an attendee of the first two (and most likely this one as well), it's absolutely worth checking out. More information available here.

In other news, outstanding brewers Vinnie Cilurzo of Russian River and Sam Calagione of Dogfish Head will be going in on a joint venture with two Italian brewers and plan on opening a massive Italian market, several restaurants and a rooftop brewery...smack dab in the middle of Manhattan (well, it's in the 20s, but who's counting?). Read up!

And finally, the Brewing News' 3rd Annual National IPA Championship, which pits 128 beers against each other in an enormous, nation-wide tournament, has just concluded the second round of judging. Yours truly has moved from 57th place up to 33rd. The run is just beginning! Check out the latest standings by clicking this.

That's it for this week's "What's Brewing?" news update. Be sure to check back next week for a new slew of goings on in the brewing world!

Beer Glassware

Beer lovers and creative geniuses throughout time have offered various container designs that have helped to put beer on display and provide full sensory enjoyment as it graces man's lips. They have done society a great deed by contributing to our experience of sipping down the golden delicious. Among the classic designs (and my personal favorites):

The Mug
(The standard and a solid go-to)



The Stein
(History, art, and sanitation all included)

The Goblet
(Hard not to love this one since it always comes with a big boozy beer inside)


The Tulip
(Graceful and sexy, also has a great pinched design for head retention and outward turned lip to deliver refreshment right to the palate - and if it's filled with Duvel, mmmm)

Das Boot
(German specialty can hold 2 or more liters of beer, and c'mon you're drinking out of a BOOT)



Half-Yard / Full-Yard
(Dates back to 17th century England, where drinking a yard of ale began as a traditional pub game. The fastest drinking of a yard of beer has been recorded at 5 seconds - dare you to try it.)

How do you drink your beer? (nuance appreciated, additional suggestions encouraged)